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Author Topic: What do you do when even your closest family member don't believe you?  (Read 9613 times)
jmiguelx44
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« on: September 24, 2010, 07:26:33 AM »

There are cases that even in situations that you need your family supports, no ever wanted to believe you, they thought you are not serious and just making excuses to justify somethings. So what do you do when even your wife don't believe you?
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Evan
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« Reply #1 on: September 24, 2010, 11:50:43 AM »

I think all you can do is look for support from others - like online fora, or other friends.  It depends too if they have reason or are just prejudiced.  If you have let them down and so they don't trust you then this may change if you show that you are believable.  If it is just prejudice it is trickier - if you can find the reason they want the prejudice there may not be another way for them to get this without it hurting you.
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sahirea
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« Reply #2 on: September 25, 2010, 07:26:06 AM »

i share you these feelings too coz my family doesnt support  me at all , they dont share me my sad moments
but sometimes this let me down and other times i dont care
as long as i know and every body around me knows thats im right
thats the only thing that matters
just like what EVAN said find support from outside


regards
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Pretty Damsel
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« Reply #3 on: September 27, 2010, 01:32:30 PM »

I agree with Evan.

Somehow, friends can really be a good source of support. Same with internet, try blogs and forums, you have a lot of advices. =)

My advice: If your wife doesn't believe in you. Explain everything to her, explain your side. Your wife should understand you. She is your partner.


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Amy Twain
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« Reply #4 on: October 01, 2010, 08:34:12 AM »

There are cases that even in situations that you need your family supports, no ever wanted to believe you, they thought you are not serious and just making excuses to justify somethings. So what do you do when even your wife don't believe you?

Things like these happen. Sometimes, they may act that way for they don't want you to feel hurt, get frustrated, disappointed or make mistakes. They actually think the best for you.

But if you know that it's the best for you and you believe in it, then assure them that this is what you want and they've got nothing to worry about. Prove it to them and tell them to wait and see...the results
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mcmandy65
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« Reply #5 on: October 02, 2010, 02:01:10 AM »

Unfortunately, you cannot make someone believe you...even your wife. All you can do is continue to be honest and look for support from your friends.
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Pretty Damsel
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« Reply #6 on: October 27, 2010, 09:24:40 AM »

Me and mcmandy65 have the same advice. Its for you to find out.  Smiley
Also, just believe in yourself and everything will be just fine.
Good luck on that.
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josephlyanez
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« Reply #7 on: November 24, 2010, 11:24:39 AM »

I very much agree with mcmandy65. You cannot make someone else believe you. You can result believable, trustful though. It all depends on your behaviours and their degree of congruency with your words and thoughts. In your post you say "what do you do when even your wife..." so I guess some other people aren't believing you either. So, it is perhaps useful to wonder why? why people don't believe me?. Could it be that you have result deceptive to them in the past? if so, why not start working on some personal changes to show them, if you really want, that your are worth of trust, an honest person with high integrity? talk them with your heart, admit your errors or faults, accept the consequences and wait for the many occassions you will have to show them they can trust you. Everything changes when you change.

Regards, all the best,

Joseph
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« Reply #8 on: December 29, 2010, 01:01:33 PM »

Hi jmiguelx44

At the risk of being controversial ....

I guess one fundamental question you may need to ask yourself is 'Do you believe you?'

If you are looking for validation from people on the outside it might be because you don't really believe in yourself?

A person who is strong and confident and loving from the inside is not necessarily affected by what other people think ...in this human world it is a common happening to be misunderstood by others or for family to doubt or distrust at times ... I guess in a way that's what families are for lol! So we can learn to become stronger from the inside.

It is great that you are part of a community like this where you can get support on your journey too ....

Wishing you all the best
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Pretty Damsel
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« Reply #9 on: December 31, 2010, 07:21:33 AM »

I agree with Adventurer. We always need to believe in ourselves first before letting others believe in us.
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Beyond Symbols
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« Reply #10 on: January 03, 2011, 09:34:55 PM »

There are cases that even in situations that you need your family supports, no ever wanted to believe you, they thought you are not serious and just making excuses to justify somethings. So what do you do when even your wife don't believe you?

Sometimes, it is past experience with certain situations that makes people withdraw support. It might not be you but what happened to someone and repeatedly convinced him/ her it is right/ wrong (if there is right and wrong at all unless we talk about murder). Try to openly talk to your wife and see where she is coming from. Even if she doesn't change her mind, it may bring you piece of mind.
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Beyond Symbols
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« Reply #11 on: January 03, 2011, 09:39:32 PM »

I agree with Adventurer. We always need to believe in ourselves first before letting others believe in us.

That is right, but I also think that if someone really shows appreciation of what you do - you start believing in yourself more. That is if you were the insecure type in the first place. You don't need others to believe in what you are capable of unless you are not that sure for yourself. And unless - of course - you have to convince your boss that you are good enough for the job and cases like that.
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Dr. G
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« Reply #12 on: January 08, 2011, 03:41:14 AM »

No matter how much we believe in ourselves, I assume that everyone goes through phases in their lives when they need support from others. People who believe in you when you have doubts.

This said, I agree with Evan: surround yourself with people that do believe in you.

However, it sounds sad to me if you do not get the support from family members. If it's your spouse (a family member that was chosen), I would highly recommend to address this issue in a very open discussion.
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fine4me
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« Reply #13 on: April 19, 2011, 10:09:21 AM »

Hi Everyone,

I'm new here and it's great to meet you people. Yes I've this same problem that your own family don't believe in what you do! In fact some members of your family even become so insecure and envious. Lately I'm doing whatever is best for my mom who's 84 yrs. old yet this other brother has to go to the extent of maligning my person to everyone about my good intentions!

I agree with Adventurer and Beyond Symbols that your believe must come from the inside out and that past experience with certain situations made them withdraw support. However, we just have to move on....

Believe in yourself! You can go here:

http://to-better-yourself.com
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« Reply #14 on: April 21, 2011, 01:10:41 PM »

Seems that you are caught in a similar situation. In the first place, I have not been married and am too young to have done so. But relations are relations, be it wife, parents are friends. If someone wouldn't believe me, I would keep quiet and go on with my work. That silence can speak a lot and mean a lot of things. i am sure that one day they will understand me. In hope lies the light.
- Ranjith
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