Self-Development Forum

General => Post your Problem! => Topic started by: MarkSLC on May 15, 2011, 10:33:16 AM



Title: Being optimistic
Post by: MarkSLC on May 15, 2011, 10:33:16 AM
How do you deal with being optimistic in the face of life's challenges, uncertainties, disappointments and setbacks? I find myself often in life faced with some frustration, obstacle or setback - things not going my way or how I would like them to go. And oftentimes, because of these incidents I feel frustrated and angry and tend towards negativity or pessimism, not because I actually believe it but moreover an expression of anger at frustration of things going wrong or unfolding in ways I don't want or are unsatisfied with.

I think the pattern unfolds like this...

1) Things go wrong in my life, or don't happen the way I expect or want.
2) As I'm angry and frustrated at this, I engage in negative self-talk and pessimism to vent my anger and frustration.
3) And so the cycle continues.

Do negative things occur in life because I tend towards pessimism or is it that I tend towards pessimism because negative things occur in my life?

I've thought long and hard about this and just "being optimistic" is very hard when things aren't going well. It also seems as though it's like denial or not being in tune with reality.

But yes, the basis of this post is mainly how can you be optimistic and positive when circumstances are pessimistic and negative? How can you look around a bad situation that is unhappy and frustrating and yet be positive and optimistic about it all?

Bit of a complex question but thanks for reading and I appreciate any insightful feedback on how I could better deal with life issues.

Thanks.


Title: Re: Being optimistic
Post by: Sus on May 24, 2011, 08:38:06 AM
Hi MarkSLC.

I can relate to your question, couple of years ago I was there too. My short advice is, if its hard for you to think optimistic when problems hit you, then try at least not think continuously about them problems, or adopt a neutral attitude, not necessary a positive one if thats difficult for you.

Good Luck!


Title: Re: Being optimistic
Post by: 0 ranjith on May 26, 2011, 07:23:59 AM
It is a very difficult thing to be optimistic all the time. When something seems to go wrong, you can't still think of being optimistic saying that the thing in front of your eyes is not real. Rather than being optimistic, try to be neutral. If you are too optimistic, you can't bear any failures and can't digest the things that you never thought of happening.
- Ranjith


Title: Re: Being optimistic
Post by: 0 ranjith on May 26, 2011, 07:26:38 AM
Hi MarkSLC.

I can relate to your question, couple of years ago I was there too. My short advice is, if its hard for you to think optimistic when problems hit you, then try at least not think continuously about them problems, or adopt a neutral attitude, not necessary a positive one if thats difficult for you.

Good Luck!
Being neutral is the best idea.